Bow.

Today in my teenage angst, I gratuitously post a picture of myself. Well more so, my hair.

Hello Giggles is my best friend. Not only do they post relevant, hilarious and brilliantly written articles, they have easy/attainable DIYs that less than handy people like myself can perform with ease.

I present to you the Bow Bun. I did this even without a mirror. How's that, you ask? I'm just that good. Just kidding. I've already noted that I'm less than handy. This instead, happens to be just that easy. So I took a picture and Warhol'd it on picmonkey (blessedly taking the place of picnik) because I'm awesome.

I like my hair to be a little messy. I don't have a lot of it and seriously, though inexplicably, feel that when it's messy, I have more hair. Either way, this worked exactly as I thought it would not. It's a winner. I think it will be my birthday hair.

Definitions.

Today in my teenage angst, I call us to take a page from Riley and define ourselves on our own terms.


This child is brilliant. Not to mention, inspiring. 

Stupid.

Laci Green.

Who knows Laci Green??? Today in my teenage angst, I feel like a part of this blog is about promoting the good things other people are doing. And I'm okay with that. Because I become privy to a lot of really great things and want other people to know about them. The more ways I can tell people, the better.

Laci Green runs an online sex education website that promotes Sex+ - Sex Positivity. It's the promotion of healthy sexual awareness as well as positive gender identity development. She's a genius. I do think that the development of sex education since the Victorian era - which if you've done any study was extremely oppressive - has left us in the state we're in. Aka, an unwillingness to approach the topic with ease, but instead with fear, euphemisms and clearing of the throats. Laci's mission is to undo that. She exposes a lot of the underpinnings of the North American view of sex, in that too much is bad, too little is bad, over-exposure is bad, hushed tones are necessary, etc, and introduces a new, positive way of understanding that beautiful thing that is sex.

Laci and I differ in a lot of areas. The greatest one I often identify, is that she's a pretty severe humanist. Her existence is owned by the human experience and she spreads that message thoroughly and effectively. So I generally take what she has to say with a grain of salt, but her encouragement to separate yourself from the patriarchal expectations of relational and sexual interactions as wells as the patriarchal definitions of beauty rings true. Beautifully so. I have a lot of passion for the positive development of sexual identity and while I don't find that to be my life's calling, I praise God for people, like Laci, who do.

The following are my most recommended Laci watches. If you want some serious, throwback to the sex-ed you probably didn't get in High School, education, there are a lot more of her videos to watch. You can also subscribe to her on Youtube, Tumblr and Facebook.

300 and the flu.

This is not about the movie three hundred watched while having the flu, but rather the fact that this is my three-hundredth post, a goal which I had hoped to achieve by the end of the year. And it's only May! So congratulations me.

This weekend in my teenage angst, I got the flu. I really never get sick. Colds, fevers, stomach aches, throwing up, it's just not a part of my life experience. Except during times of extreme excitement (travelling to Disneyland when I was five) or trauma (after both of my horrific car accidents). Other than that, the process of being sick is fairly foreign to me. I'm certain this makes me more pathetic and consequently even less functional than would be if I experienced it regularly. Janelle brought me soda crackers and ginger ale and I was hilarious delirious in talking to her. I even sang her, You're the Best Around by Joe Esposito, from the tournament montage in Karate Kid. Video below. Look at Elisabeth Shue. She's a goddess. Anyway, Janelle just replied, "okay go back to your bed" and backed away slowly. Bless her.


So I'm on the mend, now more efficiently sympathizing with others who often have the flu, instead of just empathizing, because really, I have no idea what you're going through. 

Transitions.

Today in my teenage angst, I experienced the most epic song transition on my run today. I have this playlist that I listen to when I run. It's like nine hours long and as such could get me through a dang lot of running. It's made up of amazing songs that I love. Almost. I accidentally put this one song in from The Virgin Suicides soundtrack that really doesn't belong. As I was running around the track at high school across the street and "Young Cardinals" by Alexisonfire came on. It's an amazing pump-me-up song. I often  pump my fist in the air at key points throughout.

As the song came to a close, and there wasn't even a break, in came "O Valencia" by The Decemberists. I couldn't believe it. These songs are from vastly different genres with a vastly different vibe. One, I can only listen to while running and the other, is a good for anything type of song. And yet! They are so perfect. They are so. perfectly. matched. 

Please listen to them together. One after the other. Like load them at the same time so you can hear them fade into each other with the same epic fervor that I did. 

I hope this doesn't bomb on me. 

Ghandi.

Today in my teenage angst, me and Ghandi are the same. This is mostly a joke, but also entirely serious.

The other day I took an online quiz to find out where I sit on the 'political compass.' This shows you if you're more authoritarian or libertarian, more left wing or right wing. See that red dot with Ghandi's name by it? That's almost exactly where I sit.

I like knowing this, because politics as a field has a really broad scope. And it's hard to pinpoint where you sit on every issue. And even if you know where you stand on a lot of issues, it's hard to know what those add up to. Plus, I really like politics and understanding policy and having an idea of how I would set up policy if I was in charge. Which I likely never will be and we should all likely be grateful for that.

Wanna find out if you sit with Stalin or Hitler? Click through.

Babysitting for Rich People.***

Today in my teenage angst, I remind you, unnecessarily, that I really like kids. It is because of this that I babysit with the consistency that I do. I have a pretty good background in child development which makes my care of them pretty reliable. Anyway, it also ends up that people coming in out of town, looking for a babysitter end up with me. I love this. Stranger kids are super fun because you can only work with what's happening at that moment, instead of comparing your time to others before it.

This particular family was a little overwhelming. They were staying at the Temple Garden's Mineral Spa. This is Moose Jaw's main tourist attraction. It's pretty nice and heinously expensive. But they were here for a wedding, so you know. I knocked on the suite's door and was greeted by Donald Draper. Not the fictional character of Donald Draper but definitely a Jon Hamm lookalike dressed in Mad Men costuming. In giving me the instructions, his natural assumption was that, at all points, I would know what to do. For dinner, he passively told me 'just to order room service.' I had never ordered room service before. One sweep of the room and I could tell these people were loaded. You don't look like Don Draper just because you want to.

A very poorly secretly shot phone picture of Donald Draper.

Very expensive shoes.

Legitimate Louis Vuitton bags. I do mean bags, plural. There was another one.

5-hour energy multi-packs. I don't know if this is indicative of economic status, but I thought it was weird enough to take a picture of. 

At the end of it all, it was a fabulous evening. The girls were fabulous, the parents kind and respectful. Not to mention, willing to pay handsomely for my services. I'd like to charge that much from here on out. 

Too bad normal people can't afford that.

***This post is picture-less because I'm not actually the paparazzi. Though I did take pictures that will be saved for my singular, future, reflections on rich people.

TV and Video Production.

This week in my teenage angst, my analytic nature was put to its ultimate test. Three different productions, three different points of entertainment philosophy. One was enlightening, one was frustrating, and one sent me on a roller-coaster of emotions and facial expressions. In Suzy's words, I wasn't sure what to do with my mouth. Though my situation was very different from hers.

In preparation for The Avengers, my father and I took in Iron Man. We're behind, which thinking back on it now, surprises me. Because of our distinct love of superheroes and the productions that center on them. I really didn't understand what I was getting into. The concept of Iron Man, as a superhero, was unknown to me. I knew Spiderman, as a spider man, and Batman as a bat man, but somehow I really didn't put together as Ironman as an Iron man. Because I am awesome. Anyway, the conceptualization of Ironman, as a part of the Marvel set, is an interesting one. Unlike the rest, who derive from losers and the rejected parts of society, Tony Stark is a brilliant, billionaire business mogul, responsible for much of American arms development and distribution. Thus, in his development of super-power - which we should note was for survival purposes - he is not emboldened by his power but rather humbled by it.

Secondly, you know those people who get heartburn from certain foods but continue eating them because they taste good. This has always confused me. Why are you hurting yourself? Even if you can take an antacid, wouldn't it just be easier to eat something else tasty that doesn't give you heartburn? Transfer this metaphor to my relationship with romantic comedies. I recognize the physical pain they cause me and yet, I continue to watch. I've been doing better as of late, just avoiding at all costs, but as I was shelving DVDs at the library on Wednesday night, this one literally spoke to me and said, I will be better! So I brought it home. And this is what I have to say.
WOMEN OF THE WORLD. THE HOT WOMANIZER THAT HITS ON YOU AT THE BAR WILL NOT ACTUALLY CHANGE WHEN HE REALIZES JUST HOW WONDERFUL YOU ARE!!!!!
It's disheartening to me that any woman might, even for a second, be convinced of this falsehood. It made me tired, and sad. But I'm over it. And really. Really. I'm not watching The Vow. You can't make me.

Lastly, my friends asked me to 'babysit' their nine-month-old last night. I put the babysit in quotations because they put dear little Sophie to bed before I left, so for five hours I ate Sarah's homemade pulled pork, drank their beer and watched THE WALKING DEAD!!!!! Okay, Lost fans everywhere, your dreams are about to come true. This brilliant production features everything that Lost had - even a hatch at one point - without all the confusing science fiction. Replacing that: ZOMBIES! It's amazing. And so disgusting. But so awesome. I can't even tell you how emotionally confused I was throughout the first episode. I went from so excited, to so sad, to so excited, to throwing up in my mouth, all over the course of one scene! It's a keeper. Plus, it's pretty much just started. So, we can walk alongside the brilliance that is The Walking Dead. I really, really, really invite you to join me.

To sum up, thank you for bearing with my over-analysis of everything media. You're the best.